Choose a passage (at least four sentences long) from either "Rapunzel" or "Snow White" and rewrite the passage so that it contains: 1) a simple sentence 2) a compound sentence 3) a complex sentence and 4) a compound-complex sentence.
Passage: "The poor child was now all alone in the vast forest. She was so frightened that she just stared at all the leaves on the trees and had no idea where to turn. She started running and raced over sharp stones and through thorn bushes. Wild beasts hovered around her at times, but they did her no harm."
Rewritten Passage: The poor child was all alone in the vast forest (simple sentence). After staring at the leaves out of fear, she had no idea where to turn (complex sentence). As she ran and raced over sharp stones, Snow White went through thorn bushes, and she got various cuts and wounds (compound complex sentence). Wild beasts hovered around her at times, but they did not harm her (compound sentence).
Original Passage: After a year or two, it came to pass that the king's son rode through the forest and passed by the tower. Then he heard a song, which was so charming that he stood still and listened. It was Rapunzel, who in her solitude passed her time in letting her sweet voice resound. The king's son wanted to climb up to her, and looked for the door of the tower, but none was to be found. He rode home, but the singing had so deeply touched his heart, that every day he went out into the forest and listened to it.
Rewritten: After a year or two, it came to pass that the king's son rode through the forest and passed by the tower (complex). While riding, the prince heard a song, and was so charmed that he stood still and listened (compound-complex). It was Rapunzel, and she had decided to spend her solitude letting her sweet voice resound (compound). The king's son wanted to climb up to her, so he began to look for a door to the tower. Unfortunately, there was none was to be found. The young prince then rode home (simple). As he rode he could not stop thinking of the singing that had so deeply touched his heart, that every day he went out into the forest and listened to it.
Original Passage: At first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her; but the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear, and when he asked her if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does’; and she said yes, and laid her hand in his.
Revised Passage: At first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her.(Complex sentence) The king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear. (Simple Sentence) Later, when he asked her if she would take him for her husband, she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does’. (Compound Complex sentence) She said yes, and laid her hand in his. (Compound Sentence)
Original passage : "The poor child was now all alone in the vast forest. She was so frightened that she just stared at all the leaves on the trees and had no idea where to turn. She started running and raced over sharp stones and through thorn bushes. Wild beasts hovered around her at times, but they did her no harm. She ran as far as her legs would carry her. When night fell, she discovered a little cottage and went inside to rest. Everything in the house was tiny and indescribably dainty and spotless.
Changed passage: "The poor child was alone, and in the vast forest. (Compound) She was so frightened that she just stared at all the leaves on the trees and had no idea where to turn. She started running.(Simple)She raced over sharp stones and through thorn bushes. At times,Wild beasts hovered around her, but they did her no harm. (Compound Complex) She ran as far as her legs would carry her. When night fell, she discovered a little cottage and went inside to rest. Inside the house, everything was indescribably dainty and spotless. (Complex)
Original passage: A year later, her husband, the king, married another woman. She was a beautiful lady, but proud and domineering, and she could not bear the thought that anyone might be more beautiful than she was. She owned a magic mirror, and whenever she stood in front of it to look at herself, she would say: Mirror, mirror, on the wall , who's the fairest one of all?
Revised: A year later her husband married another woman. (Simple) She was a beautiful lady, but proud and domineering, and she could not bear the thought that anyone might be more beautiful than she was. (compound) She owned a magic mirror, and whenever she stood in front of it to look at herself, she would say a few words. (complex) Mirror, mirror, on the wall , who's the fairest one of all, am I the fairest of them all? (compound complex)
Original Sentence:He wandered quite blind about the forest, ate nothing but roots and berries, and did naught but lament and weep over the loss of his dearest wife. Thus he roamed about in misery for some years, and at length came to the desert where Rapunzel, with the twins to which she had given birth, a boy and a girl, lived in wretchedness. He heard a voice, and it seemed so familiar to him that he went towards it, and when he approached, Rapunzel knew him and fell on his neck and wept. Two of her tears wetted his eyes and they grew clear again, and he could see with them as before. He led her to his kingdom where he was joyfully received, and they lived for a long time afterwards, happy and contented.
New He wandered quite blind about the forest, and he ate nothing but berries and roots, and he did naught but lament and weep over the loss of his dearest wife. (Compound) Thus he roamed about in misery for some years. (Simple)He heard a voice, and it seemed so familiar to him that when he went towards it, and when he approached, Rapunzel knew him and fell of his neck and wept. (compound complex) He led her to his kingdom where he was joyfully received, and they lived for a long time, happy and contented (Complex)
At first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her; but the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear, and when he asked her if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does'; and she said yes, and laid her hand in his.
Rapunzel was terribly frightened. A man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her; but the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been stirred. She had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. With her fear gone, he asked her if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome. she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does'; and she said yes. and laid her hand in his.
Original: She said: "I will willingly go away with you, but I do not know how to get down. Bring with you a skein of silk every time that you come, and I will weave a ladder with it, and when that is ready I will descend, and you will take me on your horse." They agreed that until that time he should come to her every evening, for the old woman came by day. Rewritten: She said: "I will willingly go away with you, but I do not know how to get down. (compound) Bring with you a skein of silk every time that you come so that I can weave a ladder with it, and when that is ready I will descend. (compound-complex) You will take me on your horse. (simple)" They agreed that until that time he should come to her every evening, because the old woman came by day. (complex)
Passage: "The poor child was now all alone in the vast forest. She was so frightened that she just stared at all the leaves on the trees and had no idea where to turn. She started running and raced over sharp stones and through thorn bushes. Wild beasts hovered around her at times, but they did her no harm."
ReplyDeleteRewritten Passage: The poor child was all alone in the vast forest (simple sentence). After staring at the leaves out of fear, she had no idea where to turn (complex sentence). As she ran and raced over sharp stones, Snow White went through thorn bushes, and she got various cuts and wounds (compound complex sentence). Wild beasts hovered around her at times, but they did not harm her (compound sentence).
Nice job!
DeleteOriginal Passage: After a year or two, it came to pass that the king's son rode through the forest and passed by the tower. Then he heard a song, which was so charming that he stood still and listened. It was Rapunzel, who in her solitude passed her time in letting her sweet voice resound. The king's son wanted to climb up to her, and looked for the door of the tower, but none was to be found. He rode home, but the singing had so deeply touched his heart, that every day he went out into the forest and listened to it.
ReplyDeleteRewritten: After a year or two, it came to pass that the king's son rode through the forest and passed by the tower (complex). While riding, the prince heard a song, and was so charmed that he stood still and listened (compound-complex). It was Rapunzel, and she had decided to spend her solitude letting her sweet voice resound (compound). The king's son wanted to climb up to her, so he began to look for a door to the tower. Unfortunately, there was none was to be found. The young prince then rode home (simple). As he rode he could not stop thinking of the singing that had so deeply touched his heart, that every day he went out into the forest and listened to it.
Nice job. How could you rework "While riding" so that it is a clause (i.e. has a subject and a verb)?
DeleteOriginal Passage: At first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her; but the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear, and when he asked her if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does’; and she said yes, and laid her hand in his.
ReplyDeleteRevised Passage: At first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her.(Complex sentence) The king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear. (Simple Sentence) Later, when he asked her if she would take him for her husband, she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does’. (Compound Complex sentence) She said yes, and laid her hand in his. (Compound Sentence)
Nice job!
DeleteOriginal passage : "The poor child was now all alone in the vast forest. She was so frightened that she just stared at all the leaves on the trees and had no idea where to turn. She started running and raced over sharp stones and through thorn bushes. Wild beasts hovered around her at times, but they did her no harm. She ran as far as her legs would carry her. When night fell, she discovered a little cottage and went inside to rest. Everything in the house was tiny and indescribably dainty and spotless.
ReplyDeleteChanged passage: "The poor child was alone, and in the vast forest. (Compound) She was so frightened that she just stared at all the leaves on the trees and had no idea where to turn. She started running.(Simple)She raced over sharp stones and through thorn bushes. At times,Wild beasts hovered around her, but they did her no harm. (Compound Complex) She ran as far as her legs would carry her. When night fell, she discovered a little cottage and went inside to rest. Inside the house, everything was indescribably dainty and spotless. (Complex)
How could you rework this to ensure that your dependent clauses are clauses (i.e. have a subject and a verb)?
DeleteCompound Complex revision: As she was running, wild beasts hovered around her, but they did her no harm.
DeleteComplex sentence revision: When she went inside the house, she found that everything was indescribably dainty and spotless.
Original passage:
ReplyDeleteA year later, her husband, the king, married another woman. She was a beautiful lady, but proud and domineering, and she could not bear the thought that anyone might be more beautiful than she was. She owned a magic mirror, and whenever she stood in front of it to look at herself, she would say: Mirror, mirror, on the wall , who's the fairest one of all?
Revised:
A year later her husband married another woman. (Simple) She was a beautiful lady, but proud and domineering, and she could not bear the thought that anyone might be more beautiful than she was. (compound) She owned a magic mirror, and whenever she stood in front of it to look at herself, she would say a few words. (complex) Mirror, mirror, on the wall , who's the fairest one of all, am I the fairest of them all? (compound complex)
How could you rework the final sentence so that it incorporates all features of a compound-complex sentence?
DeleteOriginal Sentence:He wandered quite blind about the forest, ate nothing but roots and berries, and did naught but lament and weep over the loss of his dearest wife. Thus he roamed about in misery for some years, and at length came to the desert where Rapunzel, with the twins to which she had given birth, a boy and a girl, lived in wretchedness. He heard a voice, and it seemed so familiar to him that he went towards it, and when he approached, Rapunzel knew him and fell on his neck and wept. Two of her tears wetted his eyes and they grew clear again, and he could see with them as before. He led her to his kingdom where he was joyfully received, and they lived for a long time afterwards, happy and contented.
ReplyDeleteNew
He wandered quite blind about the forest, and he ate nothing but berries and roots, and he did naught but lament and weep over the loss of his dearest wife. (Compound) Thus he roamed about in misery for some years. (Simple)He heard a voice, and it seemed so familiar to him that when he went towards it, and when he approached, Rapunzel knew him and fell of his neck and wept. (compound complex) He led her to his kingdom where he was joyfully received, and they lived for a long time, happy and contented (Complex)
How could you clarify the dependent clause in the final sentence?
DeleteAt first Rapunzel was terribly frightened when a man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her; but the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been so stirred that it had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. Then Rapunzel lost her fear, and when he asked her if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome, she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does'; and she said yes, and laid her hand in his.
ReplyDeleteRapunzel was terribly frightened. A man, such as her eyes had never yet beheld, came to her; but the king's son began to talk to her quite like a friend, and told her that his heart had been stirred. She had let him have no rest, and he had been forced to see her. With her fear gone, he asked her if she would take him for her husband, and she saw that he was young and handsome. she thought: 'He will love me more than old Dame Gothel does'; and she said yes. and laid her hand in his.
Nice job!
DeleteOriginal: She said: "I will willingly go away with you, but I do not know how to get down. Bring with you a skein of silk every time that you come, and I will weave a ladder with it, and when that is ready I will descend, and you will take me on your horse."
ReplyDeleteThey agreed that until that time he should come to her every evening, for the old woman came by day.
Rewritten: She said: "I will willingly go away with you, but I do not know how to get down. (compound) Bring with you a skein of silk every time that you come so that I can weave a ladder with it, and when that is ready I will descend. (compound-complex) You will take me on your horse. (simple)"
They agreed that until that time he should come to her every evening, because the old woman came by day. (complex)
Nice job!
Delete